Why I Used to Resent Others’ Success (And How I Learned To Celebrate It Instead)

I’m not proud to admit it, but I used to really resent it when others around me achieved success. Especially financial success. I’d feel that bitter pang of jealousy deep in my core.

It’s a common reaction.

Over 70% of people experience envy related to money and success at some point.

And for a long time, I thought my feelings were normal.

But the truth is, envy can be incredibly toxic if left unchecked.

How Money Envy Can Poison Your Mind

Envy prevents us from feeling genuine joy for others.

It makes us petty, suspicious, and small-minded.

I used to ascribe the worst motives to every rich person I knew. I assumed they must be greedy, corrupt, or have just gotten lucky. Their prosperity highlighted my own lack of wealth and made me feel insecure.

This resentment toward the success of peers, friends, and even strangers occupied way too much mental energy. And it stopped me from focusing on my own goals and potential.

Why Comparison Is the Thief of Joy

The problem with envy is it makes us compare ourselves to others. From childhood, comparison is part of human nature.

We immediately size up who has the bigger cookie, the nicer backpack, and the coolest shoes.

And this tendency to compare never goes away. As adults, we benchmark our success against former classmates, colleagues, and social media connections.

When others seem to be doing better than us, especially financially, we feel threatened. Seeing their prosperity seems to highlight our own deficiencies and shortcomings.

For a long time, I thought more money or a higher status would fix these feelings. But the truth is, nothing external can resolve an internal insecurity.

How I Began To Change My Mindset

The first step was realizing how much mental energy I wasted on envy. All the time spent feeling bitter about what others had could be better used to pursue my dreams.

I had to stop making assumptions about how others attained their success. The truth is, I didn’t know their full story. Not everyone prosperous inherits their money or acts unethically. Many earned it through talent and hard work.

I also had to check my belief that financial success was out of reach for me. I began setting my own financial and career goals.

And with time, effort, and skill building, I realized financial freedom was possible.

Tips to Overcome Money Envy

It wasn’t easy, but here are some things that helped me move past envy:

Celebrate Shared Joy

When we resent others’ happiness, we miss out on shared joy. I learned to sincerely celebrate loved ones’ success. Shared joy isn’t divided – it’s multiplied.

Practice Gratitude

Focusing on gratitude for what you have crowded out feelings of lack. It cultivates abundance rather than scarcity.

Compare Less, Compete More

Rather than envy someone else’s new car, make it a goal to get your own! Use others’ success as motivation to compete, not resent.

Focus Inward

Forget what others have and focus on your prosperity. Financial freedom looks different for everyone. Define it for yourself.

Stay Optimistic

Believe in your potential. With time, talent, and effort, you can likely achieve financial success. Envy stems from insecurity – work to build confidence.

Invest In Relationships

Shared joy strengthens bonds; shared sorrow weakens them. Feel happy for loved ones’ success. Relationships should be mutually supportive.

Final Thoughts

Once I made an effort to let go of envy, it stopped occupying so much mental space.

That freed up energy to set meaningful goals for my own life.

I invested more time in my passions and relationships. And I took steps to steadily improve my career and financial situation.

With time, hard work, and a bit of luck, I’ve been able to achieve a level of financial freedom that once seemed out of reach.

And I’m genuinely happy for peers, loved ones, and even strangers who attain success. Because I realize there’s enough prosperity to go around.

So if you resent others’ success, know you’re not alone. But also know that envy can ruin your mental health and relationships if left unchecked.

I encourage you to do the inner work to move past those feelings. Your energy is better spent on achieving your most meaningful goals and celebrating the success of those around you.